daily business.... yup yup

here's my to-do list for today:

-Go to Kinko's (or FedEx or whatever they're calling it these days)
-Pack for Seattle
-Wash car
-Confirm hotel reservation
-MapQuest directions for wherever the hell this hotel is (a good sign, no?)
-check car's fluid levels
-hit up bank
-Call and make an appointment with Holly's hair stylist (i guess this marriage is really happening.... oh boy)

i believe i will be skipping #3 :-)

apparently this trip will actually be taking place.... take-off is tomorrow! woohoo!

but right now, i'ma take a nap. i've been up for 4 hours already! yes, that means i got up before noon... Holly says i get a gold star. i say i'll probably get a migraine. fuckin wakin up early bullshit mumble mumble....

yeah, naptime. cheers!

getting ready for Seattle...

and the fun times that will (probably) follow.

first and foremost, PAX! The ladies and i will be basking in the warmth that is the direct stare of 5,000 nerdy gamers... ok, i should elabourate- the big difference between us and them is... err... well..... look it up in a biology book. and it has nothing to do with fungi, lemme tell you that.

alright, to be perfectly blunt, we have boobies, and they don't. or at least, we're supposed to. but they're gamer boys, so tit happens. :)

ergh... i have to share this photo of a guy from last year. i don't know his name, but his shirt says it all:


i can only hope to see him.... oh, and Cat Man the Enforcer (i didn't edit his photo because it detracted from the value too much.... Cat Man, if there's a problem, lemme know):


yeah, all sorts of happiness can be found at a nerd convention. huzzah! time for sleep

Currently:
Reading: Ireland
Listening to: "Never Too Late" by Michael Franti & Spearhead

what the fuck, body?

seriously, mon petit carcass, what the fuck?

i'm tired almost constantly these days. you wouldn't know it from reading my last few posts, but i wake up around 5 pm, and am ready to go back to sleep by midnight or so. this makes less than zero sense to me.... and i think you know why.

and even when i'm awake, my body feels heavy and slow. there's fuzz wrapped around my brain. i have to rest after i've walked down the stairs.

according to Webmd.com (who else is there to ask?), "A stressful emotional situation may also cause fatigue. This type of fatigue usually clears up when the stress is relieved." i wonder if that's what's shakin here... would i consider these days of a "stressful emotional" nature? when isn't this the case? after retirement?

ok, i'm going to go eat something, and take some B2 vitamins (excellent for energy, btw). cheers!

(sorry my posts haven't been as cheery as usual these days.... but even mickey mouse has a bad day)

Currently:
Reading: Ireland by Frank Delaney (it's pretty long, so i'll start just saying the title)
Listening to: "Beware! Criminal" by Incubus

who knows

today was short, and speckled with highs and lows.

i woke up at around 5 pm, and was still tired. which is kind of lame. and now, 12 hours later, i'm beginning to fade again.

went down to Kelli's work and hung out with her during her lunch break... also chatted with her coworker, Gina. that woman is fuckin hilarious! and her personal life is rough right now.... she's my hero. one of many :p

sometimes i want to dig a hole and hide for a day or two. and when i come out, i hope somebody's taken over my life and fixed things. unfortunately, i know that's not going to happen, so i guess i'll keep limping along until something gives. and hopefully, it won't be me.

he seems closer to snapping, anyways. i just wish he'd leave me alone to repair and gather myself. but texting me daily is mostly becoming a bittersweet reminder of things i can't make better. like him.

i'd apologise for griping so much, but you know what? it's my fucking blog. if i can't complain here, then where? it's better than emotionally puking on people all day long.

unfortunately, you have to suffer through it before i get to whatever you're looking for.

what ARE you looking for, anyways?

yeah, it's time for this bug to sleep. i suppose i should've put a downer alert at the top of this blog, but oh well.

Currently:
Reading: same as before
Listening to: "Pistola" by Incubus <-- i love this song... here's the lyrics:

"Pistola" by Incubus

on the tip of my tongue
an offensive is poised and rearing
my intention: a bullet
my body: a trigger finger

and my pen is a pistola
they call me a fear, fear you,
yea my pen is a pistola

my secret arsenal
is an infinite, ageless inkwell
it's a fountian of youth
and a patriot's weapon of choice.

and my pen is a pistola
they call me a fear, fear you,
yea my pen is a pistola

on the tip of my tongue
an offensive is poised and rearing
my intention: a bullet
my body: a trigger finger

yeah!
and my pen is a pistola
they call me a fear, fear you,
yea my pen is a pistola

sleeping while it's dark? what?

it's true. i'm about to get ready for bed, and it's still dark outside.

although who knows.... maybe i can hang in there long enough for the sun to show itself. SHOW YOURSELF! what movie is that from? or did i just make it up? i'm so fucking tired.

Jimmy's still out of the picture, but it's a slow process. after he woke me up at 7.30 in the fucking morning yesterday to let me know he's got too much to process, he did a similar thing today... except it was around 1 pm (i was still sleeping, though! gah!), and it was to ask me why i hadn't asked for a reason why he was taking off. i'm fairly certain that the reason of "i can't commit to anything, and i have some shit to sort through" is good enough for me, but there was no going back to sleep after that.

ok, enough griping for one night. wait- one more thing. i just drank a bit of root beer, and it made me burp (very lady-like, mind you... graceful and dainty, as i always am), and it stretched my stomach muscles out funny, and it hurt.

now i'm really done. sleep time!

Currently:
Reading: Ireland by Frank Delaney
Listening to: "I'm So Tired" by The Beatles (how perfect)